Conditional or Unconditional?

Maybe all loves need conditions to thrive...

RENI”S POV:

The kiss was long and full of emotion, like Noah was trying to tell me something without words. It was as if he wanted me to know that he loved me deeply and would always be there for me. When we finally pulled away, both of us were breathless, our hearts racing. I got out of the car, and we leaned against it together, still holding hands. In that quiet moment, I was just glad to be there, taking in his presence. It felt like all the times he had been away had melted, and I could finally believe that he was really back with me. 

We stood there in a comfortable silence, our hands entwined, for a few more minutes before Nathan, Noah’s brother, broke the silence.

“Ahem… are you two planning on staying out here, or are you coming inside?" he teased, grinning. I blushed, feeling a little flustered and embarrassed that Nathan had caught us like that. It hadn’t been the easiest day for me, and I hated that he had seen me so vulnerable earlier.

"Hi... Hi Nathan," I stammered, all the confidence I had just vanished. "I’m Reni," I said, awkwardly extending my hand for a handshake. 

Nathan was tall, nearly the same height as Noah, but there were clear differences between them. He had lighter skin, reflecting more of his white features, while Noah had a darker complexion with more defined, strong features. Nathan's curly hair was loose, while Noah’s was kinkier. He was on low-cut anyway. Physically, they were distinct, but the longer you looked at them, the more you could see the family resemblance. He was wearing gray shorts and a white shirt, looking casual yet composed.

“I know who you are, Reni. How about a hug instead?” he asked, glancing at my outstretched hand. I nodded, surprised by his warmth. 

“Great,” he said as he pulled me into a gentle hug. He was almost as tall as Noah, standing around 6’0” or 6’1”, much taller than my 5’8”. As he hugged me, I couldn’t help but cry softly into his shirt. He must’ve noticed because he pulled back just a little, trying to look at my face. 

“I don’t know what’s makin’ you so sad,” Nathan said softly, his British accent adding a soothing lilt to his words. “But I want you to know, it does get better. Time doesn’t fix everythin’, no... but it helps. You learn to carry the pain a little better as time goes.” His voice was gentle but firm as if he were speaking from experience. “So hold on to time, yeah? It’s the best gift we’ve got.” His American accent peep.

He gave me a cheeky grin as he released me, adding a little playful flourish with his hands like he was inspecting me, trying to get a clearer view of my tear-streaked face. “And whether time helps or not,” he continued, his voice a little brighter now, “we’re ‘ere for you, always.”

His words broke me even more, and I cried harder, barely managing to say, "Thank you." 

In that moment, I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to be blessed with not just one Alcott man, but two. I haven’t known them long enough but they were the kindest, most genuine men I had ever known. A part of me really wanted to meet the parents who had raised them because they were something special.

“You’ve been crying all day, whyyy?” Nathan teased, trying to lighten the mood.

“I…I’m so hungryyy,” I blurted out between sobs, and suddenly everyone burst into laughter, including me. The tears turned into giggles, and for a moment, I felt a bit lighter. I hadn’t eaten anything since brunch, which was just some French toast and eggs with Brandon.

“Thanks, Nathan,” Noah said, pulling me closer to him in a comforting hug. “Come on, let’s go inside. We made your favorite,” he said with a wink as he led me toward the house.

“Oh my goodness, you guys! This is so good! Did you make it?” I asked Noah, who was sitting across from me at the table, looking relaxed.

“Nope, wasn’t me,” he replied with a grin. “We actually had a chef come in earlier today. I’m glad you like it.”

“I do,” I said simply, savoring the meal in comfortable silence. It was exactly what I needed after such an emotional day. As I ate, I noticed Noah’s phone lighting up again and again, first with calls he ignored and then with a flood of texts.

“Noah…” Nathan called his name, giving him a knowing look like he was aware of what was happening and silently telling him to deal with it before it became obvious to me.

I saw Noah shift uncomfortably, then put his phone on silent. By the time I was done eating, the silence had become awkward, so I decided to break it. “I’ll put the plates in the dishwasher,” I offered, trying to ease the tension.

“Sure. I’m heading out for a swim. Do you want to join?” Nathan asked, grabbing his towel from beside him.

“Maybe not a swim, but Noah and I will hang outside,” I said, glancing at Noah, who seemed lost in thought. “Right, Noah?”

“Yeah… what were we talking about?” he asked, confirming that he had been distracted.

“Let’s take a walk outside?” I suggested, almost asking. I could sense something was on his mind, and I wanted to pull him away from whatever was weighing on him.

“Sure,” he agreed but then looked around. “Where’s Nathan?”

“He stepped out for a swim after asking if I wanted to join,” I said, noticing how distracted Noah still seemed. “How long were you knocked out for?” I joked, hoping to bring him back to the moment, though his absent-mindedness was starting to worry me.

“I’m sorry. Just work and family,” Noah said softly, standing up from his chair. He walked over and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead, then led the way outside.

The walk around the house was peaceful, the cool evening air helping me reflect on the long, eventful day. It almost felt like I had lived more than 24 hours today, with everything that had happened. Noah shared funny stories about his medical shadowing experience in Italy, and we talked easily. I told him about my conversation with Brandon, including the strange interaction I had with Brandon’s nephew, and we laughed together. After a while, we decided to sit by the pool, letting our legs dangle in the cool, chlorine-treated water.

“Noah…” I called out softly.

“Hmm?” he murmured, keeping his gaze on the rippling water. Nathan on the other hand, floated on a pool float, casually watching something on his iPad.

I hesitated for a moment, then began, “My earliest memory is Remi’s tenth birthday. I was three, and it was just a few days after we moved to the U.S. from Nigeria. It was the first time I realized how much I was loved, even by Remi.” I glanced at Noah, and he shifted his attention to me, listening intently. “My dad is a lawyer, and he co-owns a law firm with my uncle, while my mom is a psychology professor at UCLA. For a long time, it was just them and Remi. My mom always said she prayed and begged God for another child, and she wanted a girl. A year later, I was born.”

I smiled, remembering the story my parents loved to tell. “My mom named me Morenikeji, which means ‘I have found my other person,’ and my dad named me Morenike, meaning ‘I have found the one I will pamper.’ Depending on their mood, they called me either. My dad will always say that the combination of the two is ‘the one who brings joy.’ Eventually, ‘Reni’ stuck—probably because it was easier for kids here to pronounce. Anyway, My parents were usually busy, but they always made time for us. Whenever they had to travel, they’d take us along. Except for one time…”

I paused, feeling a lump in my throat as the memories surfaced. “When I was seven, my dad had to go to China for a few months to help a company his firm was working with. Almost at the same time, my mom got an opportunity to be an exchange professor in Rwanda for a month. She was conflicted about leaving us, and she almost declined, but my aunt—our longtime nanny—offered to stay with us. She wasn’t related by blood, but we grew up calling her Aunty. So, reluctantly, my mom left, trusting Aunty to take care of us.”

Noah reached out and squeezed my hand as I continued. “Aunty took care of us, but she also started watching the other neighborhood kids after school. Our house was always full of kids, and we didn’t mind. It was fun. But one day, she had to run to the store, and she took me and four other kids with her. Remi was at football practice, so he wasn’t there. After loading the car with groceries, I took the cart to return it. When I came back…the car was gone. She left with everyone else.”

Noah’s eyes widened as he listened, his grip on my hand tightening. I swallowed hard, feeling the old fear creeping in. “I panicked. I’d never been so scared. I was about to run back into the store when an older woman stopped me. She asked me where my mom was, and at first, I thought she wanted to help. But I don’t remember much after that. The next thing I knew, I was in a small, dirty room, and she was chewing something loudly. She was filthy, and clearly, something was wrong with her.”

My voice trembled as I relived the trauma. “She tortured me, Noah. She would hit me, bite me, throw things at me. I’d bleed, and the wounds would dry up on their own. I screamed until I couldn’t anymore, cried until there were no more tears left. I was held captive for three years. Three years of constant pain and fear. My parents never stopped searching for me, and eventually, they found me. But we never talked about what happened. Not in detail.”

Tears welled up in my eyes, and Noah pulled me closer. “My mom said my brain blocked out most of the memories as a way to protect me. But the pain runs deep. Even though I don’t remember everything, the damage never really went away. I spent years going from psychiatrist to therapist until I met Mary, my last therapist. She was the one who helped me find Christ. My parents tried, but it was Mary who really brought me to faith. I like to think that my parents planted the seed, and Mary watered it.” I gave him a smile.

Noah held me tightly as I continued speaking, his silent support helping me feel safe enough to release the emotions I’d held back for so long.

“I haven’t had a perfect life, Noah. I wish I had. But that one incident changed everything for my family. It felt like we were all carrying a piece of the guilt for what happened. My parents, my brother, even me. But I was the one left with the pain, the hurt, and the worst of all—the shame. When I came back home, I didn’t have any friends. The kids at school bullied me. Some called me dirty. Some said I was crazy. Others spread rumors that my parents were so tired of me that they left me at the store on purpose. None of it was true, I knew that. I was there, and I knew what had happened. But guess what? I still believed those lies. I let them get into my head, and for the longest time, I was stuck in that place of pain. It hurt so much.

It wasn’t until the end of middle school that I met Daniel and Tomi again. We went to the same church when we were younger, but we didn’t get close until middle school. By then, my parents had moved me to a private school, and even though Daniel and Tomi were like bright lights in my life during that time, I still hadn’t let go of the shame I carried. And deep down, I thought Daniel and Tomi saw me the same way everyone else did—broken, damaged, less than.”

I paused, my voice shaky but steadying with Noah’s calming presence beside me. I glanced at him, noticing how focused he was, listening intently.

“It was hard, Noah… so hard,” I admitted softly, the weight of those years hanging between us like an invisible thread.

Noah reached over and gently took my hand, squeezing it with warmth and understanding. “I’m so sorry, Reni,” he said quietly. “I’m sorry you had to go through all of that. No one should ever experience what you did. But do you know what amazes me? Through everything, God was with you. He was your anchor, even when you didn’t feel it. He guided you through it all, bringing you back to a place of healing. And now, here you are, with me. I’m so thankful that God led our paths to each other, that He restored time to you and made you new.”

I felt tears begin to well up, but they weren’t just from sadness. It was relief—healing even. Noah’s words cut through the layers of shame I had carried for so long.

“Reni, you’re not what they said you were. You’re not dirty, you’re not broken, you’re not crazy. None of that. You are perfect, beautiful, and whole. The enemy might try to scare you with old memories, but that’s not who you are anymore. I’m not just saying this because I love you; it’s the truth. From the very first time I saw you, I knew—deep in my heart—that meeting you was part of God’s plan for me. Do you remember the story Angie told you? I was so restless the day I saw you. It was how I knew God wanted me to talk to you. Then it was our first date… you remember how I showed up late? I overslept that day because I had a dream about the bride of Christ. It’s funny now, but in that dream, I saw the most perfect bride—spotless and beautiful. And when I came to pick you up that day, I saw you walking toward me, and you were just like in my dream, perfect. I remember hearing the Spirit say, ‘There’s nothing as perfect as my daughter; I’ve made her perfect and without defects.’”

I couldn’t help but let the tears fall now, my heart so full of love and gratitude to God.

“That’s why, Reni,” Noah continued, “I will always treat you like the princess you are. God has given me the honor of loving His daughter, and I want to love and cherish you the way He sees you. So, never forget this, You are perfect, Reni. God has made you perfect and without defects. I believe He wanted me to remind you of that tonight.”

Noah gently wiped away the tear hanging on my cheek with his thumb, and I felt the comfort of his touch. His words wrapped around me like a blanket, warm and soothing, as if God Himself was speaking to my heart. I thought about El Roi—the God who sees me. He had always seen me, through every dark moment, and now here I was, in the arms of the man who reflected that same love and care.

“Thank you, my pastor,” I teased, giving Noah a small smile to lighten the mood. I glanced over at the pool and noticed Nathan wasn’t floating around anymore. “Looks like Nathan went inside,” I said, standing up slowly. “I’m going to grab some water.”

Noah pointed toward the outdoor fridge. “There’s some cold water right over there,” he said with a nod.

I smiled and walked over to get the water, feeling lighter than I had in a long time. Noah’s love, God’s grace, and the words spoken tonight had lifted the weight I had been carrying for years.

After I grabbed the bottle of water from the outdoor fridge, I turned around to find Nathan standing right in front of me, his carefree grin greeting me. “Hi, Reni,” he said, his voice easy and relaxed, always carrying that playful tone. He casually sipped from a whiskey glass, and I had a feeling I knew exactly what was in there.

“Feeling better now?” he asked, watching me with a teasing curiosity.

“I do,” I said with a small smile, before raising an eyebrow. “And are you sure you’re of drinking age?” I teased, nodding at the glass in his hand.

Nathan sighed like this wasn’t the first time someone had questioned him about it. “Am I not allowed to drink apple juice from a whiskey glass, too?” he replied, taking another sip, clearly amused by my suspicion. “Plus, I’m 23, you know,” he added with a wink, trying to play it cool.

“Oh, of course. As long as it’s just apple juice in there,” I laughed.

“It is! I swear.” He paused, and then, with a mischievous glint in his eyes, he leaned in closer and said, “You know Noah drinks, right? He’s probably been telling you he doesn’t, but trust me—he does.”

I raised my eyebrows, mildly surprised but more amused than anything. “Well, he’s a grown man,” I said, not letting Nathan’s words stir me too much.

“So am I,” Nathan quipped back, his voice mock-defensive.

Just then, Noah’s deep voice cut into the conversation. “The real liar here is the guy with the whiskey glass who’s accusing me of drinking. You’re Italian, Nathan. You probably had rum instead of water when you were born.”

Nathan chuckled, pretending to be offended. “That’s not true about Italians. Why do you have a full bar in your house, huh? Hypocrite,” he shot back.

I grinned, joining in on the teasing. “He’s right, you know. You do have a wine shed outside, too.”

Noah raised his hands in defeat, smirking. “Alright, fine… You both got me.” He shook his head, but there was a tiredness behind his smile. He stepped closer to me, his hand finding mine, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’ll head inside. Let me know when you’re ready, and I’ll drop you off at home,” he said softly, his smile faltering just a bit. There was something in his eyes—something he wasn’t telling me.

I tilted my head and gave him a soft, knowing look. “My car’s here, Noah. I can drive myself home,” I reminded him. He looked worn out, and I didn’t want to add to whatever was weighing him down tonight. “You should rest. You look like you need it.”

“I’m fine,” he insisted, his voice firm but kind. “I’ll drop you off and grab a cab back. Please don’t argue with me, babe.” He smiled, but the tiredness in his eyes lingered.

I nodded, knowing better than to push. As Noah’s phone rang for what felt like the hundredth time that night, he finally answered it and walked inside, leaving me with Nathan. I couldn’t help but wonder what the call was about. Something was definitely on his mind, and the more I thought about it, the more frustrated I felt. I wanted to help, but he wasn’t letting me in.

Nathan, leaning on the balcony railing, took another sip of his drink, watching Noah disappear into the house. “He’s so weird sometimes. I don’t know how you manage with him,” he said with a grin, his carefree tone making the tension I felt loosen just a little.

I leaned against the railing too, facing Nathan with my back to the pool. “Oh, he’s not that bad,” I teased. “He seems like he was a cool dude growing up.”

Nathan laughed. “Oh, he was… way too cool for everyone, including our grandpa. And trust me, Grandpa is the coolest man I know.”

I laughed with him. “Now I’m really curious.”

Nathan shook his head, smiling. “Ryan and I never understood him. Noah’s always been different, y’know? Like, he’s in his own world most of the time. But I’m glad you’ve figured him out. Someone had to.”

I smiled, but it faded quickly. “Figured him out? We’ve only been dating for what—five minutes?” I sighed, my frustration slipping into my voice. “I don’t even know what’s bothering him right now. He won’t tell me. All I know is that he loves me.”

Nathan glanced at me, his expression softening. “I’m glad you know that, at least. He’s crazy about you, Reni. It’s honestly surprising to me, but I guess that’s why people believe there’s a God.” He grinned, teasing me. “Because who else could have convinced him?”

Nathan’s playful energy lightened the weight on my shoulders, but I could still feel Noah’s absence in the back of my mind, tugging at my thoughts. The conversation was a welcomed distraction, though. I leaned a little closer, genuinely curious. “You don’t believe in God?” I asked, shifting the topic.

“Uhm, more like… I’m just there,” Nathan replied, shrugging slightly. “Never had a reason to doubt His existence, but I’ve never had a reason to believe in it either. When things get like that, I think it’s best to stay in the middle, you know? No need to complicate things.”

I smiled at the way he phrased it. “It’s interesting when you put it that way.”

“It is?” Nathan chuckled, the sound light and carefree, but I could tell he wasn’t used to having conversations like this.

“Yes. Can I be the person to give you reasons?” I asked, turning to face the direction he was looking, resting my arms on the railing beside him.

He raised an eyebrow, curious. “Reasons to doubt or reasons to believe?” He tilted his head, looking at me with a mix of skepticism and amusement.

“Both,” I replied simply, meeting his gaze.

He chuckled again, but this time there was a hint of interest. “So what happens? You read me a bunch of academic papers, and I pick whichever argument is more convincing?”

I laughed, shaking my head. “I wish I had that many academic papers in my back pocket, but no. Finding God doesn’t have to be as technical as finding Nemo.” I smirked. “I just want to cause a ripple on your sail, y’know? Something that forces you to doubt… and maybe even believe. I think it’ll be beautiful if you choose a side, and whatever side you pick, you’ll at least have real reasons for it.”

Nathan grinned, intrigued now. “So this isn’t about conversion? You want me to have faith in something, even if it’s not necessarily in God?”

“Yes, smarty pants,” I teased. “I mean, your brother and I believe in God. It would be a little embarrassing if the reason you don’t believe—or even doubt—is because none of us ever really told you about God.”

Nathan stood up straighter, still grinning. “Fine. Sounds like a fun ride. I’m in,” he said, turning to face me fully. “How long is this little journey gonna take?”

“As long as it takes to get you to believe,” I said, catching the look in his eye. I could tell he was about to make a smart remark, so I quickly added, “Yes, even if you only end up with doubts.”

“You’re a brilliant woman,” he said with a soft laugh, his eyes twinkling. “I see why Noah adores you.”

We both laughed as we made our way back inside. Just as we stepped through the door, Nathan paused and turned to me. “Also, about what’s bothering Noah… maybe you should just ask him or, even better, let him tell you himself when he’s ready.” 

I smiled softly, appreciating his advice but knowing that it wasn’t always as simple as just waiting for Noah to talk, and Nathan knew that too.

When Nathan and I finally got inside, Noah was still on the phone, pacing by the window. His tone was sharp, more frustrated than the last time I’d seen him on the call. It was like he was speaking to the most infuriating person alive. “Can you just stop? I already told you I’ll see you at dinner on Sunday, Aurora,” he practically growled into the phone.

There it was again—her name. Aurora. I didn’t know who she really was or why she had this hold on him, but her name was beginning to bother me more and more. I felt a knot tightening in my stomach, wondering when Noah would finally explain who she was and why she seemed to be a recurring problem.

Noah hung up the phone, and his expression softened the moment he saw me, though the frustration in his eyes was still visible. 

“Are you ready to go?” he asked, trying to hide the irritation still lingering in his voice.

“Yes, I’m ready. But are you okay?” I asked, genuinely concerned.

“I’m fine,” he replied quickly, almost dismissively. He turned toward Nathan, who had been watching the whole scene with a raised brow. Nathan was smiling, but it was the kind of smile that hid how much he didn’t like the way Noah was acting. “Where are her car keys?” Noah asked, his tone clipped.

Nathan rolled his eyes dramatically. “Can you try speaking to me nicely for once?” he shot back, walking over to the kitchen table to grab the keys. “Here. And you’d better turn that frown into a smile before Reni smacks you for shouting at her favorite Alcott— me,” he teased, tossing the keys to Noah, who caught them without even acknowledging the joke.

I smiled at Nathan and said, “Bye, Nathan. I’ll see you later.”

Noah led me outside, his usual care still present as he opened the passenger door for me. He didn’t say anything as he walked around to his side of the car and got in. 

The drive to my house was unusually quiet. Noah’s lips moved silently—he was praying under his breath, and though I didn’t want to interrupt, the silence between us felt heavier than ever. After a few minutes, I decided to ask, hoping it wasn’t something serious back home. “Babe, what’s bothering you?” I asked, reaching over and rubbing the back of his neck to ease the tension I could feel radiating from him.

He hesitated before blurting out, “I’m not sure I want to drop you off at your house tonight.”

His words caught me off guard. I hadn’t expected it to be about me. He had so many other things on his mind lately—why was he suddenly focused on this?

“I’m fine, Noah. What’s this really about?” I asked, pulling my hand back.

“I know you’re fine, but I’m allowed to worry. Can I drop you off at Angie’s instead?” He rubbed his forehead with his free hand, clearly stressed.

“No. No, and no,” I replied, feeling a surge of frustration. “Stop treating me like a child. Is this why you insisted on driving me home?”

“I’m not treating you like a child! Why do you always have to misunderstand me?” he snapped back, his frustration bubbling over.

“Because you never try to be understood. Stop trying to make decisions for me,” I fired back, my voice rising.

“I’m not making decisions for you. I literally just asked if I could drop you off at her place instead,” he said, exasperated.

“Well, you can’t. Drop me off at my house. Thank you.” I folded my arms, staring out the window, my annoyance growing.

He didn’t respond. He just kept driving, the tension in the car growing thicker. After a few minutes, he sighed. “I can’t believe we’ve had our second fight today. This isn’t—”

“Working?” I interrupted, my words sharper than I intended. “Is that what you were going to say?”

“No. That’s not what I was going to say,” he replied, his voice strained. “This isn’t normal. That’s what I meant.”

He pulled over to the side of the road, signaling as he found a spot. He hadn’t even parked properly before I started talking.

“So, do you want to break up? Find someone more ‘normal’ so you can have a normal relationship? Maybe with Aurora? Is that what you want? Is that why you’ve avoided talking to me about what’s bothering you? Is that why you wanted to drop me off at Angie’s? So I wouldn’t go crazy when you—”

“Be quiet.” His voice wasn’t loud, but it carried a weight that filled the car. It wasn’t angry—it was desperate. “For the love of everything holy and true, Reni, be quiet!”

I blinked, startled by his tone, but it silenced the whirlwind of words spilling out of my mouth.

“Do you really think this is fun for me? That it’s fun when you throw breakups in my face every time we argue?” His voice cracked with frustration, his hands running over his hair. “You honestly think I enjoy feeling like I’m the reason you get like this? I’m always walking on eggshells around you, just trying not to set you off. And I’m still here, Reni. I told you I’m not leaving. We’re supposed to figure this out together, but it’s like you don’t believe me. Like nothing I say will ever be enough for you to trust that I have no hidden agenda."

His words were fast, filled with hurt and exasperation. “Every time you threaten to leave, it feels like you’re already halfway gone. Do you think it’s easy to hear that? You’re hurting me. I don’t think you even realize how much. The way you talk to me when you’re angry—it cuts deep. And the way you look at me… like I’m the one who’s broken your heart, like I’m the bad guy here.” His voice softened, but the weight of his pain lingered. 

“Please, baby… Please.” He paused, his chest rising and falling as if the words were too heavy to carry. “I love you, but I can’t keep doing this if we’re just going to tear each other down every time. I’m begging you. Can we not keep going down this road?” His voice trembled, raw with emotion, his vulnerability laid bare in front of me, and it was then that I realized just how deeply I’d wounded him. I didn’t realize how much I’d been hurting him. Being with Noah had shown me my shortcomings, the ways I failed to communicate, and the ways I lacked understanding.

“Don’t call me ‘baby,’” I said quietly.

“What?” he asked, his eyes wide with surprise.

“I said, don’t call me ‘baby.’ Not until you’re ready to address the elephant in the room.”

“Aurora?” He sighed deeply, rubbing his hand over his face, the weight of everything pressing down on him. His fingers lingered over his eyes as if trying to push away the frustration building inside. “I’m not sure what you’re ready to hear about her, but I’m not cheating on you. I would never. She’s a family friend. We grew up together, and when we were younger, we had a thing. The family knew about it, but it’s long over. I didn’t want to bring it up because I didn’t think it was worth worrying you over. I was going to tell you when you feel much better. Can you at least trust me to handle it?”

I felt like my head was spinning. “Your ex is back in your life, and you’ve been seeing her since you went to Italy, and you didn’t think to tell me?”

“Italy? How did you—” He stuttered, caught off guard. “I’m sorry, but I promise you, there’s absolutely nothing going on between us. I barely see her. And I will soon be back in Miami fully.”

“Wait, you’re going back? When? Oh, that’s why you’re seeing her on Sunday? Sure, Noah. Sure,” I muttered, feeling the weight of the situation crash down on me. “Just drop me off at my house.”

He clenched his jaw, clearly irritated by how the conversation had turned into something about Aurora. He started the car and drove the rest of the way in silence. The tension in the car felt suffocating as Noah pulled up to my house. His silence was louder than any words he could have spoken, and I could feel the walls closing in between us. 

I sat there, watching him through the window as he booked a cab without another word. I knew he was angry—angry at how the conversation spiraled, angry that I couldn’t just let it go. But how could I? His evasiveness was like a splinter under my skin, and the fact that Aurora, his ex, was now back in his life without me knowing felt like a betrayal. I wasn’t ready to just brush it aside. 

“Goodnight,” he said stiffly, his tone clipped and distant, not even looking at me as he spoke.

I opened my mouth to respond, but before I could, he had already climbed into the waiting cab, shutting the door with a finality that made my heart sink.

As the cab pulled away, I could hear him answering his phone, his voice fading into the night. “Yes, Dad?” The last thing I saw was the red glow of the cab’s taillights disappearing down the street, leaving me standing in front of my house, feeling colder than I had ever felt before.

I stood there for a moment, my thoughts racing, the chill of the evening settling into my bones. Everything felt wrong. It wasn’t just the fight—it was the way we couldn’t seem to find our rhythm anymore. Noah and I had always been good at talking things through, but tonight felt different. It felt like we were on two different planets, orbiting around the same problem but never really meeting in the middle.

I sighed, rubbing my arms to stave off the chill, and headed inside. As I closed the door behind me, the silence of my house felt heavy, a stark contrast to the emotional storm I had just left outside. My thoughts kept replaying the conversation, the words that had been said, and more importantly, the ones that hadn’t. 

Aurora. The name hung in the air like a thick fog I couldn’t see through. Noah might not have been cheating, but keeping me in the dark about her felt like a breach of trust. I needed answers, but more than that, I needed to know why he hadn’t trusted me enough to tell me in the first place.

I sank onto my couch, staring at the wall, feeling the weight of everything pressing down on me. Maybe Nathan was right. Maybe I should have just waited for Noah to tell me himself instead of letting my fears get the best of me. But now… now I wasn’t sure if waiting would make things better or just push him further away.

I didn’t want to lose him, but I also couldn’t ignore the storm of emotions swirling inside me. Something had to change, though I wasn’t sure what that would look like yet. All I knew was that this fight wasn’t the end of us—not by a long shot.

I headed for a shower, hoping the warm water would wash away some of the tension. Afterward, I sat in front of my bedside mirror and decided to indulge in my longest skincare routine, using it as a distraction from the fact that Noah and I had just fought. This time, he hadn’t even looked at me. My heart pounded in my chest, a confusing mix of sadness and frustration weighing heavy. I tried to focus on each step of the routine, taking my time with every product, but the thoughts of him lingered in the back of my mind.

When I finally finished, I glanced at the clock—it was almost 2 a.m. I slipped into my soft cotton nightwear, the gentle fabric offering a bit of comfort as I curled up in bed.

Closing my eyes, I turned to prayer, whispering my worries to God. I prayed that He would help Noah and me navigate this rough patch, and as I poured out my heart, I realized how sorry I was for not loving Noah the way God wanted me to. I knew I needed to apologize to Noah too. That thought sat heavy, the kind of apology that’s hard to swallow because it felt like we both shared the blame.

Just as I picked up my phone to send Noah a message, a notification appeared: “I’m sorry about tonight. xo.” My heart skipped a beat. I was about to type out my own apology when his call came through. I hesitated for a moment but answered, letting the quiet fill the space between us.

“Morenikeji,” he began softly, “one day we’ll have to talk about you reporting me to God every time we fight,” he teased, trying to break the tension.

“You left me no choice! I was scared,” I confessed, my voice trembling just enough for him to notice.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed, his sincerity cutting through the silence. “It’s been a long couple of days, and trying to manage everything has been... exhausting. I didn’t mean to raise my voice,” he added, even though I couldn’t remember him ever doing that. “I’ll work on communicating better. I know I need to improve, but please give me grace while I figure it out. I’m really sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too,” I replied, my chest tightening with the weight of everything unsaid. “I’m sorry for hurting you. For not listening, and for always looking for a way out of our arguments. I promise I’ll do better.” The ache in my heart deepened because we weren’t having this conversation in person. “I hate that you left angry with me.”

“I didn’t,” he said softly.

“What?” I jumped out of bed, racing down the stairs toward the window. “Are you outside?”

“Uh-huh. I was going to beg until you forgave me,” he said with a giggle, and as I peered out, I saw him standing in front of my car, still parked where he had left it.

Instantly, I flung open the door and dashed outside, leaping into his arms. He caught me effortlessly, and my heart raced like it did when I was a teenager in love.

“I love you so much,” I exclaimed, the joy bubbling in my voice.

“I love you, too. But we really need to stop fighting,” he said, his breath a little shaky from the way I was hugging him so tightly. “Reni, you’ll strangle me!” he joked, and I finally loosened my grip.

“I’m so sorry! I said I’m sorry, okay? We won’t fight again. I promise,” I replied, my heart racing as I giggled at how silly this all felt. The weight of our earlier argument melted away, and a lightness filled the air between us, making it hard not to smile.

“I’m sorry too,” he murmured, his arms still wrapped tightly around my waist. His embrace felt strong and comforting, grounding me in the moment. “We just need to find a way to make this work.”

“Then take me everywhere with you,” I joked, trying to keep the mood light, even though my heart fluttered excitedly.

“Would you really come to Italy with me?” he asked, his eyes bright with a mix of hope and uncertainty.

“Of course! I’d go to Mars with you,” I laughed, my voice bubbling with enthusiasm.

“Great! So we can go together tomorrow?” he said, his face lighting up with that infectious smile that always made my heart skip a beat.

“What?” I exclaimed as I hopped down from his arms, my mind racing to comprehend what he was saying. 

“Since you’ll be coming with me, I don’t have to wait until Saturday to leave,” he explained, his gaze steady as he searched my eyes for a sign of my reaction.

“Wait… are you serious?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper, disbelief washing over me. It felt surreal, like something out of a dream.

“100%. You should meet my family anyway. Then, when we’re back, we’ll go see your parents,” he said confidently as if it were the most obvious decision in the world.

“Noah, oh my goodness! I don’t even know if your parents will like me. What if it’s too soon—” I stammered, the fluttering in my stomach turning to a knot of nerves.

“I like you, and that’s all that matters right now,” he reassured me, his sincerity shining through. “Nathan loves you too. I’m sure everyone in Italy will fall for you just like I have.” His words enveloped me like a warm blanket, calming my worries just a bit.

“Okay, but I have to get my hair done, and I need to buy new clothes—”

“Didn’t you just get your hair done today?” he asked, raising an eyebrow, a teasing smile on his lips.

“It took you this long to mention it! That’s why I need to change it,” I pouted playfully, leaning against him, feeling the heat radiating from his body. 

“I’m sorry! I meant to mention it, but something always came up,” he said, his tone earnest. “Your hair, your nails, your lashes—they’re all stunning, wifey. You’re the most gorgeous woman in Italy, and you haven’t even set foot there yet.” His voice was like honey, smooth and warm, and I felt a blush creeping up my cheeks under his intense gaze.

“This isn’t good,” I said, feeling a delightful mix of fluster and excitement. “I’ll end up pregnant if you keep looking at me like that!” I joked, half-laughing, half-serious, as my heart raced in response to his smoldering stare.

“I won’t touch you until you walk down the aisle with me,” he said, his smirk growing wider, the playful challenge igniting a spark of mischief in the air. “Unless you make me.”

“What?” My eyes widened, and I nearly choked on my spit, the shock sending me into a fit of coughs. 

“I’m joking! Oh my God, you should have seen your face!” he laughed, the sound warm and infectious, and I couldn’t help but join him, feeling lighter with each chuckle.

“Don’t do that,” I pouted, still trying to hide my embarrassment, but the playful banter felt electric between us.

“You started it,” he said, his smile radiant, clearly enjoying the way he had flustered me. 

“Take my car back with you,” I suggested suddenly, recalling that he didn’t have his car with him.

“I don’t have to. I’ll just book another cab,” he replied, shrugging it off.

“I insist,” I said firmly, my voice leaving no room for argument, feeling a surge of determination. “So, will you be kissing me goodnight or…” I teased, tilting my head, my heart pounding in anticipation.

“You’re asking for trouble, baby,” he said, his gaze locking onto mine, a playful glint sparking in his eyes. “Also, when you mentioned the elephant in the room earlier, I was going to talk about the kiss instead, but I knew you would have cut off my tongue and fed it to me,” he said, laughing heartily.

“I’m glad you knew that!” I said as I rolled my eyes at him.

“Anyway, while we’re on this topic, I’ve been thinking… What are your boundaries, Reni?” Noah asked softly, his voice filled with tenderness as he looked into my eyes. There was a seriousness in his tone, one that made me realize this wasn’t just a casual question.

“Boundaries? In what way?” I asked, feeling a bit unsure where he was headed. My mind raced, trying to understand the shift in the conversation.

“You know, like, what you don’t want to do in this relationship. The lines you don’t want to cross. The things you feel are important for us to avoid,” he explained, his eyes searching mine for any hint of understanding. He paused, looking at me with a gentle curiosity.

I blinked, trying to gather my thoughts. “I haven’t really thought much about it,” I admitted, my voice softer now, feeling the question sink in. “I mean, I know the things I want in this relationship, things I’d love to experience with you. But as for boundaries… Maybe you should tell me yours first?”

He took a deep breath, his brow furrowing just a little like he was carefully weighing his words. “Reni, I want to do this right,” he began, his voice steady but sincere. “I want to honor God in you, in us. I think we should wait until we’re married. It’s about respecting you, but even more, it’s about making sure I’m doing right by God—in everything. My work, church, family, and especially this relationship.” His gaze softened, though there was a flicker of uncertainty like he wasn’t sure how I’d react.

Hearing him say that filled me with a kind of peace I hadn’t expected. No guy had ever asked me about my boundaries before. It felt different, like he truly cared about my heart, my thoughts, and my values. “Noah, I would love that too,” I said, my voice steady but filled with emotion. “It means so much that you want to honor God in this. Honestly, this is the first time anyone has asked me what I think about something so important...”

He smiled then, a slow, easy grin that lit up his face and made my heart skip a beat. “I know it won’t always be easy,” he said, his tone lighter but still serious. “But we can take it step by step, be intentional about it. Think about your boundaries—what you want to protect—and let me know. We’ll pray about it together, sound good?” He placed his hands gently on my shoulders, anchoring me in that moment before pulling me into a warm hug.

I rested my head against his chest, feeling his steady heartbeat, and for a second, everything felt so clear and peaceful.

“I will,” I replied, pulling back slightly to meet his gaze. “Thank you for asking.”

He leaned down, his breath warm against my ear as he whispered, “See you in the morning, Big Reni.”

A giggle escaped me at the nickname. “See you in the morning, Noah Bear,” I whispered back, my heart fluttering with happiness. As I turned to head inside, a smile lingered on my lips. I was already counting down the moments until we’d be together again.

STR Spotlight Corner:

Shout out to Talking Joe!🤪 I can’t express how much your consistency means to me. Your comments and likes light up my day and always lift my spirits! They truly encourage me to keep going. I pray that God surrounds you with people who will champion you and celebrate your amazing gifts just as you do for me!🤍